Monday, February 24, 2014

I Love My Son

Today, I am honored to be featured in the Hendricks County Home online magazine.

Take a gander here...

Then make sure and read the rest of the magazine and subscribe.  You may not be in Hendricks County, but the articles are fantastic wherever you are. 

Monday, February 10, 2014

Things I Just Don't Understand

There are several things on a daily basis that just don't make sense to me.  Now, keep in mind, MENSA has never knocked down my door or anything, but still... I'm not Sarah Palin.  I am a reasonably intelligent functioning adult, but still.  Sometimes, I just don't get it.

For example... 

Why do people feel the need to open conversations by asking stupid questions?  For a short time, we owned a Great Pyrenees, which is basically a giant white snow beast of a dog.  When walking that dog, people would ask me "Is that your dog?"  No.  This canine is really a figment of your imagination.  Actually, even though I have three children and another dog, I just find strays and walk them when I have free time.  Ha ha,  free time.  Get it?

Why do people feel the need to point out that you don't look very good?  I'm at Meijer today and my cashier, who I don't know, feels the need to exclaim that I look "toe up."  I'm not sure what that means, but when I googled it, it doesn't seem like a compliment.  Clearly, I have a cold.  You can hear it when I speak or sniffle, and I have a droopy eye that is following in Bob Costas's eyesteps... but that doesn't mean I still don't pretend in my head that I look like Heidi Klum. (I realize I don't look like her when I'm healthy either, but my mental picture of myself doesn't have to know that.)

Why do people say things like, "This smells bad.  Smell it" or "this tastes bad.  Taste it."  My answer to both.... no.  I am more than willing to take you word for it.  I don't need to confirm it by experiencing the yuck for myself.

My son will not wear lip balm on his chapped red lips because he says he doesn't like the way it feels wet and slimy.  Then he licks his lips 100 times a minute.  How is that not wet and slimy?

Its not just other people, either.  Sometimes, I confound myself. 

When given too much time on my hands these past few weeks, I decided we needed a complete rearrangement of the playroom.  I executed this mission with the precision of a marine and the time frame of a.... well, I can't think of anything that actually works on time and efficiently anymore.  But, in a matter of two days, it was repainted, rearranged, reconfigured, etc.  I work tirelessly until its done.  However, it resulted in several photos that I chose not to rehang, and while I needed to get that room done immediately, I am quite content to let the stack of photos sit on my dresser upstairs indefinitely before I put them with the other photos in the bin in my closet.  But, by God, I got the playroom done.

I know that I need a pair of clean black yoga pants to wear to work tomorrow, but I just keep restarting the dryer instead of switching the laundry. In my head, I know I can take it out and move forward, but in my laziness, I feel like it needs a little touch up.

I menu plan for the week and grocery shop Monday mornings.  I rarely actually cook Monday night.  I feel that much effort should be rewarded with take away or eating out. 

So, with all that being said, I am heading to Cheddar's for dinner, because I shopped today and probably wearing dirty yoga pants at work tomorrow. But, if you see me, don't mention how bad I look.  I'm over it.

Monday, February 3, 2014

The Price of Being a Pushover

I, like every woman, am a weird combination of personality traits.  Not weird in a Cybil way, but more in a Meredith Brooks, "I'm a bitch, I'm a lover / I'm a child, I'm a mother / I'm a sinner, I'm a saint" kind of way.  And yes, I realize every reader now has that song stuck in their heads.  You're welcome. 

I am steadfast in my beliefs and I do not cower.  If you say the R-word, I am on it like a dog on a bone (or a dog on my shoes, if we're using my actual dog as an example).  I am pro things and against things, and while I know my friends and family might disagree, I will respect that, but I won't change.  In contrast, I am a complete wet mop, door mat, knock me over with a feather pushover if you need something.  I am easily guilted into doing whatever project or serving whatever function you need.  Make a note, because if you need something, I will agree to it even when I don't want to.  I'm handy to have around.

I used to assume that this need to please just affects me.  I am pressed to fit it all in and I have the need to make it all really good, so I won't even half ass the stuff I don't want to ass at all.  I'll do it well, but I've come to realize that it isn't just a weight I put on my shoulders.  Its shouldered by my family as well.

When I am stressed to fit it all in, I stress my kids out, too.  I work three part time jobs so I can be home with my children, but I am not doing them any favors when I bite their heads off constantly because their wants aren't fitting into my hectic schedule.  How fair is that?  We're tightly scheduled with the things that my kids want to do, and I'm fine with that because they deserve to participate in scouts and sports.  But, then I add in my own junk and suddenly the 2 minute window I've created for a potty break is gone and my kid needs a drink of water which is outside the time allotted to getting him drinks and suddenly I'm snapping at him for the fact that he dare get thirsty when I am busy.  Good thing I don't have him in daycare when he can get cared for with this much love and affection, right???

The funny part is that I can say no to my friends.  I can tell them that I don't have time to go out, or I don't feel up to it.  I know that they will love me (and/or tolerate me) regardless.  Its the acquaintances I can't say no to.  In my need to prove to a total stranger that I can do it all and help where needed, I am proving to my kids that I put a stranger's needs above their own.  I'm showing that my time is most important solving problems that someone else can solve, instead of the ones in my home which need a mommy to do it best. 

Well, I've decided today that I'm done with that.  I am going to be a good mother, and to do that I might not be able to be a good school, PTO, church, scouts, work volunteer.  I am going to say no to others so that I can say yes to my kids.  I will still have my three part time jobs, but when I'm home with my kids, I'll focus on them full time.  And for that, I'll be liked and appreciated by the ones that mean the most instead of those that matter least.