Tuesday, November 4, 2014

The Talk

My 8 year old son came to me and said, “Mom, kids on the bus call privates something else...”  At that moment time stopped and the list of expletives that ran through my mind would make Quentin Tarantino blush.  Oh, no.  It’s time for “The Talk.”

I asked him if he knew what his “wee” (as I call it) was really called.  He said, with a look and an attitude that I’m a moron, “Duh, it’s a wee WEE.”  After a lengthy internal debate about whether to just say, “You’re right” or go down the road to “Penisville,” I decided to jump in, eyes closed and terrified.

Coincidentally, not long before this conversation, I attended a fantastic training about child sexual abuse prevention and one point was that parents should speak to their children about sex by third grade.  Upon hearing that, the moms in the room sat up straight in shock.  What?  Third grade?  Why, that’s my son’s age!  The training said that you want your child to hear all sexual facts from you first.  Don’t sit back and let them learn from friends.  My thought was that my son wasn’t learning anything sexual in third grade.  Then the above happened.  Point, taken, training.  You win.

I didn’t go into how babies are made or in depth into functions of sexual organs.  But, I took a small step in that direction, and the giant leap will come soon.  We discussed the real names of parts that he has, and the different parts that girls have.  He asked questions (like if I didn’t have a penis, how could I pee), and I answered them.  And despite both of our trepidation treading into new territory, I was glad we had the talk.

Now, not only will my son know that his wee wee is really a penis, he also knows that he and I can discuss it.  Anything that comes up (no pun intended, well… maybe a little), he can come to me. He will not be lost in a world of denial where sex and anatomy don’t exist, and he certainly won’t feel shame or embarrassment.  My son will talk to me about the hardest topics to talk about… and that talk is the best talk of all.