Wednesday, November 10, 2010

My Husband's Disabled...

I haven't mentioned this in past blogs, but I think today is my day to admit it. I don't want to feel ashamed and I don't want your pity. I just want to be able to admit that Mark has special needs and not be embarrassed. Deep breath.... ok.... Mark has partial blindness and partial deafness. Whew... there... I said it.

Apparently the blindness is sporadic. It doesn't seem to affect his driving or anything that needs to be done at work. It seems to kick in when he walks into this house and there are messes around. Suddenly, when he encounters such issues, he goes blind. He cannot see the crumbs on the counter from his breakfast preparation, and he cannot even see our dishwasher. He is forced to leave his dishes in the sink or on the counter. Sadly, the issue is so devastating that while he can see the coffee pot well enough to make coffee, once his mug is poured, he cannot see it to empty it or clean it. It really is amazing how he powers through the hard times.

The other side to his disability is the selective deafness that he experiences. Luckily for my family, this doesn't seem to affect his work, unless I call him at work and ask him to stop by a store and buy bread on the way home. Then he becomes instantly deaf and is unable to complete the request. Luckily, that only happens when I call, and not when his boss speaks. Thank God!!! When he comes home, I may ask him to do laundry, but how could he? He can't hear me ask and he can't see the pile of laundry overflowing the laundry room. And, how could I expect him to know that Tabbi has Girl Scouts or volleyball on a particular night? He can't hear me when I tell him. But, he suffers without complaint. He's a trooper.

I feel like a burden has been lifted by coming out with Mark's disease. I no longer need to be ashamed of the coffee grounds spilled all over the stove top. I need to embrace them and realize that this cannot be helped. He is a fully functioning partially blind and selectively deaf person, and I should be grateful for the sight and hearing that he does have. Thank you, Mark, for being so strong despite all that you suffer from. I will strive to pick up the pieces. OH WAIT!!! I ALREADY DO!!!


jennifer said...

my husband is actually deaf in one ear- but I always say he doesn't have a hearing problem, he has a listening problem!

Hopefully by your coming out, other wives will as well and perhaps research for a cure will begin.

metamorphstorm said...

Knowing other wives/girlfriends who suffer from this horrible disability (hey, the woman suffers more than the man who has it) makes me feel better. Now, off to clean the stove, the floor, the bathroom, start dinner, do laundry, and tell my boyfriend he's the greatest, because hey, he'll hear that!