Monday, July 19, 2010

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day...

You know it is going to be a bad day when...

When you wake up convinced that you are dying because you cannot get a lungful of air and you see your life flash before your eyes and you quickly pray for your children's future as you slowly close your eyes.... and then you realize it's the stupid cat sleeping on your face.

When you step into the shower and your hair gets tangled on your shower curtain and you can't get it off without ripping it or suffering the indignity of calling for help as you stand naked in your bathroom. And thanks to the ripping, you now need a hair cut.

When you put your deodorant on generously under your right pit because you know it is going to be a hot one, and then realize there is none left to do your left. So, you have to use your hand to wipe some off the right and spread it to the left.

When you step out of your bathroom and see that your almost two year old managed to destroy your room more thoroughly than a category 5 hurricane with a tornado chaser.

When you realize that all of this really happened and it's only 9:32am.

When you sit back at swimming lessons later and see that your son and stepdaughter are doing awesome and think that this day has actually turned itself around... only to come home with McDonalds and dump the bag in the garage on the dirty nasty floor.

When you come back in the house from cleaning all the trashed McDonalds off the garage floor only to realize that your four year old spilled the entire contents of the keg of lemonade on the kitchen floor.

When you realize that all this has really happened, and it is only 1:26pm.

When your husband comes home and only then do you remember that once you discovered the spilled lemonade, you forgot to completely finish the french fry mess. So, then you ask him about whether or not he saw it (secretly hoping that he will say yes, and that he cleaned it up, too.) Then he will say yes, and when you get a nagging feeling that you need to confirm that he cleaned it the right way... you will discover that his version was sweeping the fries into the grass. Your grass. Your front yard. And it's raining. So, now instead of fries in the garage, you have a pile of fries in the front yard. Soggy, wet fries. Yes, you have now realized that your house is the one your neighbors are blogging about.

When you realize you still have an hour and a half until bedtime.

1 comment:

Amie said...

On a positive note, your husband was coming home from work, which is a good thing.