Friday, August 28, 2009

Top 10 Reasons Why Will Shall Be Kicked Out of PreSchool

10. Because he has a habit of saying "Jesus" every time something bad happens.... and I am pretty sure he doesn't mean it in a "Jesus, please forgive me for spilling my grape juice and grant me the power to use my quicker-picker-upper to clean it."

9. Because he thinks learning is playing with trucks while listing off every truck classification he can think of. Picture Bubba from Forest Gump, but in construction. "There's dump trucks, lifter trucks, fork trucks, tanker trucks...."

8. The teacher is going to be sick of holding off the Lilliputians to keep them from tying Will/Gulliver down so he doesn't step on them and squish them.

7. Because he kept asking when he gets to go on stage (aka the altar in the room where the church services are held) and sing. Not sure Pastor C is going to be thrilled with a booming "If You Like To Talk To Tomatoes" drowning out his sermon.

6. Because he can't pass a drinking fountain without "refilling his tank." And the school has three. That's a lot of pit stops.

5. Because Genius (aka Mark) taught Will how to "farmer blow" last night. Yeah. Good call, Mark.

4. Because Will still wants prizes for going potty, even though he's about three months potty trained, and I am pretty sure Miss M isn't going to want to dig around her purse for that Altoid that fell out of the tin back in 2003 just to get him to stop screaming "I GET A PRIZE!!!!"

3. Because when you ask Will to color inside the lines, he takes that to mean within the borders of the desk or table he is coloring upon, but not limited to an outline on the picture on the paper on which he is to color.

2. Because I really didn't realize we were supposed to bring in school supplies at Meet the Teacher night and I still have no idea what those supplies are supposed to be. Oops.

1. Because the idea of having Will gone two mornings a week, during the time which Jack takes a morning nap... It's just too good to be true!


Tuffy said...

Farmer blow!

That's freaking awesome.

captcha: hiantedu

Busy Bee Suz said...

Ahhh. He will do fine and those two mornings will certainly FLY by fast.

Jounice said...

The title alone made me laugh out loud. It is going to be ok...really. I agree with Busy Bee the time will fly by.

(but if he gets in trouble for the Farmer blow make Mark go to explain)

Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

Mike - Yeah, you and Mark are going to be banned from his presence if he ever does that at school.

Suz - I am sure they will.

Jounice - That is a really good idea.

metamorphstorm said...

I was gonna ask what a "farmer's blow" was, then I Googled it. (I'm a definite Googler since I never know what anyone's talkin' about.)

And, eew. Since I had to Google it at the age of 21 while your son learned it at...well, preschool-age, you know for sure I was one of those dress-wearing little girls taught to "sit like a lady," not how to blow snot outta my head... !!