Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Is it me?

Do you know that I am only friends with one person that I knew back in high school? To say we are friends is even pushing it as we trade emails maybe once or twice a year. I went to her wedding a couple years ago, and that is the last time I saw her. So, I would say that while I care about her and would like to talk more, she is my friend in the loosest definition of the word.

I would like to think my friendlessness is because I moved a couple times. I grew up in Iowa until 14 and then moved to Kansas. So, I think my elementary school friends went by the wayside because I left. Then I left Kansas to move to Indiana after college graduation because my parents moved and it was either follow them and mooch some room and board or live in a box. I picked mooching.

Really though, I am not sure I can blame the moves for my lack of lifelong friends. I can't think of anyone that I really miss. I think I am absent an attachment gene or something. I lived with my college roommate for three years and upon graduation and move out, I just waved goodbye. No hugs, no tears. My high school/college sweetheart and I broke up after a nearly 4 year relationship and I literally cried for roughly 30 seconds and then was 100% over it. When I moved from Iowa, I didn't even bother to write my best friend since preschool. I am not a lingerer. I say I will keep in touch, but I really don't. (Keep that in mind if you are a current friend of mine that is moving... I don't mean it when I say it so don't expect it.) I am like a guy who says he will call you after a date. We all know he won't so, don't wait by the phone, so to speak. I see my friends hang out with their friends since elementary school or high school and it amazes me that those connections still exist. I am not sure I even know the person I was back then. And I certainly don't know that I would want to be friends with her.


TexInTheCity said...

"I picked mooching." HA! Girl, I pick mooching over a box ANY DAY!

I feel you on the friend thing. I am not friends with anyone from high school. I am always amazed when someone from my high school days want to be friends on Facebook. What is THAT about?!

Amie said...

I don't think it's strange...it just happens. I no longer really have anything in common with the girls that I'm friends with still that I've known since junior high or before, we're really friends based on the past. If I met them for the first time today I'm not sure we would become friends. We certainly don't hang out like we used to...but I think that also just happens as people get married and have families.
Because of MySpace I've reconnected with a lot of people I used to be good friends with in high school...and that's sort of the perfect reconnection. You email every so often, and that's that...no stress over hanging out, or not knowing what to talk about.
Then again, I guess it could be you. :o)

Lori said...

I have loads of friends from my childhood that I still see/talk to regularly. We all grew up here in Indy (I've never left), and we have a great network between us. Even the ones that moved away come back to see us regularly. I certainly wouldn't want to live with any of them now, but I love that I have them all. It's like having a huge extended family. Granted, a few of them (okay, a lot of them) have some issues, but I still enjoy them and it's fun that we're all growing old together. My hubby, Jeff, on the other hand, is more like you Lynn. Moved a lot and didn't keep in touch with childhood friends. We refer to his oldest friend as "Jeff'sonlyfriendJim"...poor guy. Luckily, he's been affectionately adopted by my congregation:)

Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

Tex -- I don't get that either. Why try to reconnect with people you barely knew back then???

Amie -- Thanks for that at the end. Now you're on my cut off list.

Lori -- I had you in mind when I said something about friends keeping in touch with friends from elementary school. But, it might be a stretch to call Jeff lucky!!!