Is it me?

Do you know that I am only friends with one person that I knew back in high school? To say we are friends is even pushing it as we trade emails maybe once or twice a year. I went to her wedding a couple years ago, and that is the last time I saw her. So, I would say that while I care about her and would like to talk more, she is my friend in the loosest definition of the word.

I would like to think my friendlessness is because I moved a couple times. I grew up in Iowa until 14 and then moved to Kansas. So, I think my elementary school friends went by the wayside because I left. Then I left Kansas to move to Indiana after college graduation because my parents moved and it was either follow them and mooch some room and board or live in a box. I picked mooching.

Really though, I am not sure I can blame the moves for my lack of lifelong friends. I can't think of anyone that I really miss. I think I am absent an attachment gene or something. I lived with my college roommate for three years and upon graduation and move out, I just waved goodbye. No hugs, no tears. My high school/college sweetheart and I broke up after a nearly 4 year relationship and I literally cried for roughly 30 seconds and then was 100% over it. When I moved from Iowa, I didn't even bother to write my best friend since preschool. I am not a lingerer. I say I will keep in touch, but I really don't. (Keep that in mind if you are a current friend of mine that is moving... I don't mean it when I say it so don't expect it.) I am like a guy who says he will call you after a date. We all know he won't so, don't wait by the phone, so to speak. I see my friends hang out with their friends since elementary school or high school and it amazes me that those connections still exist. I am not sure I even know the person I was back then. And I certainly don't know that I would want to be friends with her.