Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Mommy, Me Vet

So, I wake up this morning to Will saying "Mommy, me wet," although he says it with an unexplainable German accent so really it was "Mommy, me vet." I am not German. I don't know anyone German, but for some reason Will speaks like he just left Berlin. So, I start to get up when I realize that the sheet he is laying on is also "vet." That sheet being the sheet on my bed, so lucky me... me "vet" too. The comforter is "vet", his puppa (which he used to pronounce pup-a and has recently become poop-a... not sure if that his part of his German alter ego Adolf or just another fun filled Willism) is "vet" and his pajamas are... you guessed it... vet. Not the best start to my morning. Especially after being out with the girls last night and not wanting to wake up at 8:00a anyway, let alone waking up at 8:00a covered in Will's wee wee. I am pretty sure just about everything that is touching or has ever touched my bed is currently vet. Sorry Bentley, you are vet, too.

Needless to say, I was shocked by the wee tsunami that overcame my bedroom. Will sleeps in his own bed, but last night he had a leaky diaper around 3:00ish, cried and Mark brought him into our room changed his diape and jammies and let him go back to sleep with us. (Insert comments about how we are bad parents because he sleeps in our bed at times here... but keep in mind that a smart parent does what it takes to get back to sleep as quickly as possible so as to not be kept up all night by alternating screams from a 4 month old and 2 and a half year old. And if you still think we're wrong, give Super Nanny my number and I'd be happy to have her fix me). So, I was pretty surprised that in the time between 3:00a and 8:00a our entire room was knee deep in Will potty. The boy is a drinker/vetter but that was a lot. So, I bring him downstairs (to avoid waking Jack who was up at 6:00a thanks to Mark's UNGODLY LOUD ALARM THAT MAY RESULT IN OUR DIVORCE IF HE DOESN'T TURN THE VOLUME DOWN) and unzip his jammies and lo and behold... the reason for his tidal wave of wee. Mark put his diaper on INSIDE OUT. Ok, so not completely inside out, but correct on his butt, twisted between his legs and inside out in front. In case you were wondering, the exterior of Pampers Baby Dry is not terribly absorbent. Where is ShamWow when you need it??? And for all of my friends who tell me how lucky I am because Mark gets up with the kids sometimes at night and helps out... I leave you with the thought of wee covered sheets, down comforters, dogs, puppas, Wills and mes and say... not that lucky.

10 comments:

Mark said...

This would be the issue with changing a diaper in the dark so as to not wake everyone up and being half asleep.

WA said...

Hahaha!
Poor you--hope you are no longer vet.

Amie said...

LOL...
Well...I guess you could always try cloth diapers...

Jounice said...

LOLOLOL...ah memories!

Momo-Mama said...

Just came across your blog on Pioneer Woman and thought I would shoot you a comment!

Love this post. Maybe you should just go with the whole German thing and start calling your baby Villiam, it sounds cool!

Villiam is Vet...

If you're interested, take a look at my blog and read about my "two evil robot children" momo-mama

Nicola said...

just saw your comment on Pioneer woman and wanted to say that it really does get sooo much easier! I have a 3 and half year old boy and an 18 months girl and have had the joy of watching them play together all over the Christmas period - a marked reduction in the "mommy" wails and demands for attention I have had over the last three years. One still does not sleep through - but then I always take them into bed when they need it - sue me Super Nanny, She has no kids of her own! Once my eldest hit three it was plain sailing after that - it will get easier.

OHmommy said...

That is so cute.... we have said that my youngest daughter likes to speak in a chinese dialect.

What a sweet memory. No? :)

Laura the Famous said...

Villiam is Vet- I love it!! Can I call him Villiam from now on?

Domestic Goddess (In Training) said...

Mark - Next time, take the risk of waking us up.

WA - All clean... for now!

Amie - I am thinking POTTY TRAINING!

Jounice - I bet! Three times the pee ocean at your house, back in the day.

Momo - Thanks for reading. I will definitely check yours out! How could I not check out two evil robot children!

Nicola - Thanks for that! A light at the end of the tunnel!!! Who knew?!?!

OHMommy - My 5 month old speaks in more of an Asian thing too. We call it Chubanese. Its too funny.

Laura - He loves you so much you could call him anything... as long as you just call him.

metamorphstorm said...

My family's German (and I know a little) so hearing all the words pronounced with a "V" instead of a "W" inexplicably brought my mother's voice back to me. Cool!

But, uh, sorry about your vet bedroom!