The following is a true story. It happened yesterday to my friend Laura.
Laura lives far away. When I say far, I mean F-A-R away. She lives in a small farming town, which means that neighbors are miles away. Typically it doesn't bother her, because she lives with a husband and two kids, but yesterday she was alone. Her husband was in Iowa with his father who had heart surgery and her kids were off doing kid things. So, Laura was at her house trying to get things done. She sat upstairs in their converted attic/now office, and she heard sounds. Laura tried not to worry, but when you are alone and neighbors are far away... you take notice of sounds. She heard a creak and a crack. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up. Then, she decided it was just the wind. She heard another creaky whine and dismissed it as the house settling. She heard another creak in the wood, and decided it was just her imagination. Suddenly.... she heard the scariest noise of all... Hannah Montana. Singing. What kind of sick serial killer taunts their prey with Hannah Montana??? Evil! Psychotic! Demented!
Laura decided to make her way down the stairs, better to confront her serial killer where she can get away than trapped in the attic. She continued to hear the whiney Hannah Montana song getting closer and closer as she walked down the stairs. She followed the song, expecting her Miley Cyrus obsessed attacker to be on her at any moment until.... she found her daughter's Hannah Montana doll in the dog's mouth... with her arm bent to make her sing.
So, the moral of the story is this... nothing in the world is as scary as a Hannah Montana singing doll!