Saturday night, a friend asked if I would get involved if I knew someone in the Rihanna/Chris Brown scenario. My first thought is, duh? Do you not know me by now? I get involved in just about any scenario. What? You're fighting about who should do the dishes? Let me tell you the my opinion. What? You need to know how to raise your kids? I have all the Super Nanny infused knowledge to lead you down the right path. Just take me with you when you go! What? You need a letter written to your orthodontist threatening to sue? I am on it! I may not be able to see clearly in my own life, but by God I have the insight and the 20/20 vision on everyone else's!!! I am nothing if not involved, so don't get me started on the Chris Brown/Rihanna thing. I got 'er covered!
The situation between Chris and Rihanna is so totally vague that I hate to even speculate (yeah right, I love me some speculation) on what happened. I would guess that they both got violent, and if I had a friend in that situation, I would make it pretty clear that is unacceptable. If you are a chick and you're with a dude that makes you mad enough to abandon all communication skills and resort to violence... the dude ain't your Mister Right. Likewise, if your dude lays a hand on you, provoked or not... dude ain't the man for you. This seems pretty cut and dry to me. There is such a thing as a "deal breaker" in my world, and violence on either person's part has to be it. And if I found out that any of my friends, male or female, was resorting to violence and/or the victim of it... I would get involved.
After our conversation, it got me wondering. What would you do? Am I rare in the fact that I would be involved? I wouldn't head in guns blazing and invite the batterer to take a swing at me... I have three kids to take care of. God knows I can't damn them to a life of delivery pizza and video games if Mark was a widowed dad. But, I would certainly pull up to the curb at 4am, to drive my friend away while the a**hole slept. And, until my friend was ready for that, I would be that bug in your ear every single day until you left saying, "You're too good for this. Don't stay. Go! Go! Go!" I am not sure I would sound as cheerleadery as that looks when typed out, but I'd risk it and say it anyway. So, I pose this question to the masses.... if you had a friend in that situation, would you get involved? Or would you wait til they figured it out themselves?
And while we are on the topic of violence, let me just throw this out there. There is a new blog called Violence Unsilenced at http://violenceunsilenced.com/. This is a forum for victims of domestic violence or other abuse to get their stories out. Victim or not, any reader will be touched by the bravery of these women and applaud the strength that it took to say "I will not be a victim anymore." Just last week a woman posted that she is living with an abusive boyfriend and was trying to get out. Total strangers offered either a place to say, financial assistance, loving support and it is that community-wide action that will make women feel empowered to leave. I highly recommend visiting this site, if for no other reason than just to say that the violence that one in four women suffers should not go silent anymore! We, as a people, are mad as hell and we're not going to take it anymore! See, told you I'd get involved!!!